Netflix Review: Don Jon (2013)

The adult version of Gordon-Levitt morphed from Bruce Willis into Tony Danza.

Having known the basic premise of the movie, I find myself wondering why I ever bothered to watch it. The protagonist, Jon, has his simple pleasures in life: his body, his pad, his ride, his family, his church, his boys, his girls, and his porn. His problem is that the latter seems to be his greatest preoccupation. What possibly drew my interest to this film was the idea that it might address the issue of porn addiction, something that would be pretty bold for a major feature film to do. However, it fails to do this and really offers nothing of value in its place.

It is intentionally repetitive in how it structures its narrative, but despite this self-consciousness it is not any less repetitive to the audience. The story moves as if on a treadmill; there is no progress or climax or resolution. Jon starts as a guy who likes to watch porn and to sleep around and is dissatisfied with it, courts and sleeps with Scarlett Johansson and is dissatisfied with it, sleeps with Julianne Moore, stops watching porn, and apparently finds things more satisfying even though he knows they have no future as a couple (she is 21 years his senior, after all). And then the credits roll, leaving me wondering, "What just happened?:

The characters are annoying throughout. Scarlett appears to be a strong reactionary to 2nd wave feminism, abhorring the idea that Jon would vacuum or mop his own floors. Are there really women who exist who prefer men who have a strong aversion to household cleaning? Tony Danza couldn't have been more obnoxious; I'm not sure if he was acting. Why am I still writing about this? Don't watch it.